FilmBender: sh*tfaced on movies

"Dogtown and Z-Boys" doc shreds Hollywood

Growing up in the Midwest and subscribing to Surfer Magazine and living for BMX races probably doesn't put me in the bucket of unbiased moviegoers when it comes to critiquing the documentary, Dogtown and Z-Boys.  It is directed by 70's skate legend, Stacy Peralta.  What's notable about this doc, first and foremost, is that it was actually kinda re-made as a sports drama three years later and directed by the cool chick, Catherine Hardwicke, who also did the amazing and disturbing Venice Beach drama, Thirteen.  I'll put that review on ice for another day, but the Hollywood version of the skate doc that she made is called Lords of Dogtown, and it starred big names like Johnny Knoxville, Rebecca De Mornay, and even Heath Ledger (who here as well, seems to morph himself into a completely different person somehow [maybe he was a shape shifter]).  That movie is pretty good, but the documentary is what speaks to me... maybe that's along the same rules as "the book is always better than the f*cking movie" for some reason.

Anyway, just watching these kids and the freedom that they experienced back then, of which, is far from what kids likely feel in big, oppressive cities nowadays.  But here, also in Venice, California, Stacy and his "local" group of surfers figured out that skateboards were only being used for cruising and slalom-style race competitions (p*ssies); yet due to a perfect non-storm, drought left swimming pools empty and a lack of waves left Stacy's clan searching for ways to re-create kick-turn wave maneuvers somewhere on land.  Ultimately, the excitement of trespassing over people's fences and dropping into those curvy-bottom pools charged their vision and quenched their thirst and changed the world.  Watch the movie trailer and read on because...

"Defiance" of any humor whatsoever

Kinda hard to write a blog post on a site that attempts to write funny commentary and/or reviews of movies and do so for Defiance -- a film about one thousand Jews who miraculously avoided concentration camps and death itself by hiding and running and hiding again in the forests... constantly avoiding air attacks, ground attacks, disease, starvation, inner-anarchy, in-climate weather and, er, pregnancy.

It's driven by these two guys, Liev Schreiber and Daniel Craig, brothers at war with each other, with the Germans and with the odds.  Total f*cking bad *ss and humble heroes.  It's a true story.  Done well every grueling step of the way.  Watch the movie trailer and read on because...

Intermission: around the web and better than popcorn

Watching movies and blogging about them 24/5 and taking a break on the weekend to pay attention to my family and tend to personal hygiene.  It's a life.  Take a break yourself and visit these cool sites:

• Film Critic compares Clint Eastwood to Archie Bunker in Gran Torino... good review, thought it would be a great movie (isn't everything Clint does gran[d]?), and I know Archie is the greatest.

• Hrmm... Mongo Nation has video interview with horror movie director James Wan (Saw) on his puppy movie shorts for XBox Live... grrr.

• Time to break for a little NSFW (when you're home does that stand for Not Safe For Wife?), of which, anything good can be found from GorillaMask.net.

• Sh*t... here comes the wife, quick click to gallery of Megan Fox (OMG is she hot) on AskMen.com.

• Funny comparison of how totally hot Giselle Bundchen and how totally smokin' Heidi Montag each react to paparazzi on TheDailyFix.

• Ok... I finished with that believe it or not... time for a smoke and a drink at The Bachelor Guy (oh those were the days).

• And I've got kids too (and d*mn are they screaming right now)... ironic that I'm reading a deadly review of the movie The Unborn on ScreenCrave... like I said, it's a life.

"La Femme Nikita" is THE point of no return

Bridget Fonda starred in the English language remake of Le Femme Nikita in a movie called Point of No Return.  Anne Parillaud plays the femme fatal in the original, of which, is infinitely better than the remake.  Although that's partly due to Anne being more fit for the part, but it really is due to the talent behind the lens and not the firearm.

As he's shown with other works like The Professional (Jean Reno co-starred in that and this) and The Fifth Element, Luc Besson is masterful at creating a thrilling adventure without the bubblegum.  And Le Femme may be his masterpiece.  It's much grittier than this still portrays, and it is able to maintain a sense of realism given the near-impossible task of making this chick seem like a ruthless and capable assassin instead of simply being a sexy babe who talks too much and is useful to the extent that she can cook and clean up around the house.  [I hope my wife's not reading this, or I'm f*cked.]

"Eastern Promises" to f*ck you up

Viggo Mortensen is a "driver" for what I think is a London-based Russian mafia group, but it's tough for me to keep that sh*t straight.  What I do know is that he serves as the driver for the mob boss and also as a "heavy" if you need a little protection or retribution.  The film's called Eastern Promises, and it also stars hottie Naomi Watts.  She's stumbled upon a diary that implicates the boss and the family (not hers) into all sorts of dirty, stinky, stuff.  But she's blond, so she does some st*pid sh*t and gets her and her real family all tied up into it.  But again, since she's blond, the "heavy" only wants to f*ck her up in the good way... so at least for a while... she's spared her life.

Throwing all that good stuff away, there's still so much about this movie that's great.  Take Viggo's fight scene in the bathroom that's totally butt naked, brutal, hilarious and shockingly violent.  You'll love it.  The fact that his life story is in his tattoos is a cool as are the brothel scenes (and not because there's bangin' or anything like that).

"Man on Wire" on crack

Am amazing image from the past.  Funny how this media event was completely lost over the years and then entirely wiped out and obviously over-shadowed on September 11th.  Man on Wire is the documentary of Philippe Petit's incredible obsession, lifestyle and accomplishment (and seemingly lack of employment).

The doc has plenty of great footage of Philippe first conquering the divide of the towers of Notre Dame and then the bridge of Sydney Harbor.  It also shows all of the planning and practicing that Philippe, his girlfriend and the rag tag crew he assembles (much like that of the Ocean's Eleven team [without any actual experience]) must do in order to simply get inside and rig the f-ing wire itself.  Their attitudes reflect that of what the 70's served up -- free love, over easy and often toasted.  Case in point... after he makes it, he's an instant rock star (groupie-in-a-hotel-with-a-video-camera romp and all).

"Dazed and Confused" and blazed and amused

 

Jason London plays the all-around school stud in Dazed and Confused -- quarterback and partyer yet remains unclassified.  He, along with Parker Posey, Ben Affleck and a few others also give great performances that likely line up with all the common cast of characters in every high school across the country in any decade.  But this isn't just any decade... this is the 70's, so you might also find a few dudes in this movie that are unique in every imaginable way.

Case in point, Matthew McConaughey.  This is basically the Texan's break-out debut, and man it is f-ing hilarious.  He's a smooth and slimy alum who literally hangs out at his former high school and cherry picks.  You've never seen syrup this thick... he's awesome.  Famed Slacker, also-Texan Director, Richard Linklater created the ultimate character and discovered a superstar to fill it.  Groovy.

"Slumdog Millionaire" earns every penny

 

I can't help but stop thinking about Freida Pinto, Slumdog Millionaire's "precious" One Ring.  She is so, flawless.  I felt like I was desperately searching for her just like the mensch, Dev Patel.  And when the older brother scars her face, I felt rage and sorrow and disbelief that someone could bring themselves to taint her beauty.  Anyway, I think I'll get over it.

This film is awesome [I'm sure I'm not the first one to tell you] -- a mix of battle, chase, dream, corruption, torture, betrayal, survival, and most definitely, longing.  You'll have to be the judge on whether or not she's just looking for a sugar daddy and whether the game show host [Anil Kapoor] looks like Luis Guzmán.

Intermission: around the web and better than popcorn

Wonder if I'll ever get tired of movies.  I try to watch at least three per day.  Some people think I'm crazy or sick.  At least I'm not smoking crack, right?  And, obviously, I take weekends off.  Here's some diversions:

• I'm sorry, but Kim Kardashian is hot... I'm sure there's plenty of pics you could Google [and oogle], but AskMen.com is a good place to start.

• GorillaMask.net is a link-out haven to everything that a guy (or a human with a pulse) can't help but check out.

• And if that doesn't get you, a movie title like Lesbian Vampire Killers sure will... ScreenCrave has the trailer.

• Vanity license plates can be a real hoot... The Bachelor Guy has found some good ideas.

• Busta Rhymes interviewed at the Spike VGA's on Mongo Nation.

• Slumdog Millionaire among others made Premium Hollywood's "best movies of '08" list... they've got their "worst of" list as well... check it out and then start out '09 armed with good info.

• And closing it off with a little brewski is Bullz-Eye and their beer reviews and guide, of which, will also help keep me armed with some good info [and a pint] as well.

"Pulp Fiction" is a cool mystery

There's at least a gazillion reasons that Pulp Fiction is the coolest movie ever made.  I am not stating that it's the best, but after fifteen years of testing, the coolest.

Before I simply list a few, I thought I'd start out by saying that a "conspiracy" email went viral detailing all the mysterious little things in the film that go unexplained... this email nicely wrapped up all the issues with credited analysis and put a bow on everything including the Ving Rhames back-of-the-neck Band-Aid, the glowing briefcase, the biblical quotes and the shots at point blank that, er, miss.  Here's a hint of these related theories.  I'm sure if you Wikipedia or Google this stuff you'd find much more.  Wish I could find that old email for you.  It was from '95 or something.  The movie spawned my first viral email.  Cool.

As always for famed director Quentin Tarrantino, he picks an original and punchy soundtrack of eclectics and stuffs the cast with unique actors portraying distinctive roles.  Harvey Keitel, Rosanna Arquette, Samuel L. Jackson, Uma Thurman, Bruce Willis, Eric Stoltz, Rosanna Arquette, Tim Roth, Ving Rhames, Christopher Walken, Steve Buscemi, and ultimately, John Travolta -- introducing, redefining, solidifying and resurrecting.  Totally cool.

"City of God" is located on the other side of the tracks

 

Think sunny and breezy beaches with brown-skinned babes in stringy bikinis basking in warm blue waters... ahh... Rio de Janeiro.  Now watch City of God and tell me where in the f*ck that paradise happens to be.  D*mn.  That city is no where to be found.

The director, Fernando Meirelles, who's also behind the more recent acclaimed, The Constant Gardener, puts together a highly charged, dramatic and action-packed portrait of the slums of Rio that is full of dust, drugs, crime and kids with guns.  You can't believe the hardships these kids live with every single minute of every single day.  This movie lets us infiltrate the inner-workings of the families and the gangs who must be the children of God.  Bless them.  I got it easy.